FreeAds
04-26-2005, 04:10 PM
FreeAdsNews Ezine Issue #10
Published April 26, 2005
Subscriber Count: 49,067+
From: Michael Rasmussen, Moderator
Hi friends,
In today's lesson, you're going to learn how to deal
with people who flame you on the forums. A flame is a
post that is negative or derogatory, and is usually
designed to attack you. If you don't think it'll ever
happen to you, think again. At least now you'll know
exactly how to handle it.
This is a short newsletter, so go ahead and read the whole
thing right now.
How to Deal With Discussion Forum Flames
Unfortunately, flames are a part of the everyday
reality of discussion forums. Not knowing how to deal
with them is like not knowing how to defend yourself if
you're walking through a part of town where you know
there is trouble lurking. Luckily, forums aren't nearly
as dangerous as your local ghetto.
Why People Flame
There are 3 main reasons that people construct flame
posts. They are:
#1 – They are perceiving an injury or loss, and they
believe that you are the one who's responsible for the
pain they are feeling... so they want to counter attack
to make themselves feel better.
#2 – They are in an emotional state when they are
writing their post, and they aren't thinking about the
long-term consequences of their actions.
#3 – They are imagining themselves as the victim of
whatever situation they are in, and they are imagining
that YOU are their victimizer.
Now that you know why people flame, let's talk about...
How to Handle Them
The first thing you need to know is that you can't
fight fire with fire… no matter how cool it sounds when
you say that. That stuff usually only works in the
movies.
In real life, you have to fight fire with water. Here's
my five-step process for doing just that. This has been
tested and proven in dozens of situations.
STEP #1 – You have to write two text documents.
The first one will be a private email that you send to them,
and the second will be a response to their post on the forum
itself.
SIDENOTE: You have to write both of these at the same
time, because you're going to be sending them at the
same time.
STEP #2 – When writing to them, tell them that you
understand how they could feel the way they feel, but that
their feelings are based on a misunderstanding.
STEP #3 – Point out the specific errors in their post,
and gently correct them. Fill them in on the information that
they are missing or that they misinterpreted.
STEP #4 – Tell them how you will fix the problem, and
then instruct them on how to fix the mistake they made by
flaming you on the forum. Explain to them that you are
forwarding their post to your attorney (but only say this if
you mean it), and that you would like their contact info
if they don't plan on doing step five.
Speaking of which...
STEP #5 – Politely ask them to apologize to you
publicly on the forum, and explain to the people who
are following the thread that he/she made a mistake.
WORD OF WARNING – Don't go
around making legal threats to people just because you're
angry about their flame. If you don't actually have a lawyer,
then don't tell people you're going to have your lawyer
contact them. Going the legal route is something best
saved for last resort.
Also, one other thing… make sure you take a screenshot
of their post, and save it. It would also be smart to
copy and paste their post into a text file, because the
moderators might delete the entire thread before you
can save the evidence.
In Conclusion...
The key to handling flames is to not take it personally, and
to act quickly before the damage spreads.
BONUS TIP – One last thing that might help you craft
your reply to the person who wrote the flame… tell them
that you ALSO hate it when people do to you what he
thinks you did to him. For example:
If someone flamed you for not responding to an email on
time, you can say, "I hear ya... I hate it when people
don't get back to me quickly either. I've been away at
a conference for two days, and I wasn't able to get to
my email account until just now."
Of course, don't say this if it's not true, but I think
you get the idea.
Make sure you bookmark this page as a reference in
case you ever find yourself at the receiving end of a
nasty forum flame.
By the way, you never have to worry about being
flamed or harassed here at the Free Advertising Forum (http://www.FreeAdvertisingForum.com)
because we do not allow it. If you ever feel someone
is causing you to have an unpleasant time let us know.
We like to keep this a friendly place where everyone
can post.
Happy Advertising!
Warmly,
Michael Rasmussen, Moderator
Free Advertising Forum
P.S. - Have you had a chance to customize your Forum
Webpage yet? What are you waiting for? It includes your
very own ClickBank search engine where you can earn up
to 75% commission on over 12,000 digital products. Many
of our members are earning $75-250 every day!
Click here for instructions. (http://freeadvertisingforum.com/showthread.php?t=67369)
-----------------------------------------------------------
Michael's Weekly Sales Tip:
Send your customers free products with their
product package. The freebies should have your ad
printed on them. It could be bumper stickers, ball
caps, t-shirts etc. This will allow other people to see
your ad and order.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Michael's Weekly Marketing Resource:
Article Equalizer is the fastest, easiest, and most
efficient method of adding tons of quality content to
your web site. You can instantly generate 1000's of
pages for your site from selected articles.
View Article Equalizer (http://www.freeadvertisingforum.com/recommends/articleequalizer.html)
*************************************************
Free Advertising News is a free bi-weekly ezine for
Internet business owners and super affiliates. Please show
your support by forwarding this issue to your friends or
associates who would find this content useful. Thanks!
© Copyright 2005 By FreeAdvertisingForum.com
All Rights Reserved Worldwide.
========================
Free Advertising Forum
1563 Solano Ave., #306
Berkeley, California 94707
Phone: 510-619-9510 Fax: 510-217-9222
Published April 26, 2005
Subscriber Count: 49,067+
From: Michael Rasmussen, Moderator
Hi friends,
In today's lesson, you're going to learn how to deal
with people who flame you on the forums. A flame is a
post that is negative or derogatory, and is usually
designed to attack you. If you don't think it'll ever
happen to you, think again. At least now you'll know
exactly how to handle it.
This is a short newsletter, so go ahead and read the whole
thing right now.
How to Deal With Discussion Forum Flames
Unfortunately, flames are a part of the everyday
reality of discussion forums. Not knowing how to deal
with them is like not knowing how to defend yourself if
you're walking through a part of town where you know
there is trouble lurking. Luckily, forums aren't nearly
as dangerous as your local ghetto.
Why People Flame
There are 3 main reasons that people construct flame
posts. They are:
#1 – They are perceiving an injury or loss, and they
believe that you are the one who's responsible for the
pain they are feeling... so they want to counter attack
to make themselves feel better.
#2 – They are in an emotional state when they are
writing their post, and they aren't thinking about the
long-term consequences of their actions.
#3 – They are imagining themselves as the victim of
whatever situation they are in, and they are imagining
that YOU are their victimizer.
Now that you know why people flame, let's talk about...
How to Handle Them
The first thing you need to know is that you can't
fight fire with fire… no matter how cool it sounds when
you say that. That stuff usually only works in the
movies.
In real life, you have to fight fire with water. Here's
my five-step process for doing just that. This has been
tested and proven in dozens of situations.
STEP #1 – You have to write two text documents.
The first one will be a private email that you send to them,
and the second will be a response to their post on the forum
itself.
SIDENOTE: You have to write both of these at the same
time, because you're going to be sending them at the
same time.
STEP #2 – When writing to them, tell them that you
understand how they could feel the way they feel, but that
their feelings are based on a misunderstanding.
STEP #3 – Point out the specific errors in their post,
and gently correct them. Fill them in on the information that
they are missing or that they misinterpreted.
STEP #4 – Tell them how you will fix the problem, and
then instruct them on how to fix the mistake they made by
flaming you on the forum. Explain to them that you are
forwarding their post to your attorney (but only say this if
you mean it), and that you would like their contact info
if they don't plan on doing step five.
Speaking of which...
STEP #5 – Politely ask them to apologize to you
publicly on the forum, and explain to the people who
are following the thread that he/she made a mistake.
WORD OF WARNING – Don't go
around making legal threats to people just because you're
angry about their flame. If you don't actually have a lawyer,
then don't tell people you're going to have your lawyer
contact them. Going the legal route is something best
saved for last resort.
Also, one other thing… make sure you take a screenshot
of their post, and save it. It would also be smart to
copy and paste their post into a text file, because the
moderators might delete the entire thread before you
can save the evidence.
In Conclusion...
The key to handling flames is to not take it personally, and
to act quickly before the damage spreads.
BONUS TIP – One last thing that might help you craft
your reply to the person who wrote the flame… tell them
that you ALSO hate it when people do to you what he
thinks you did to him. For example:
If someone flamed you for not responding to an email on
time, you can say, "I hear ya... I hate it when people
don't get back to me quickly either. I've been away at
a conference for two days, and I wasn't able to get to
my email account until just now."
Of course, don't say this if it's not true, but I think
you get the idea.
Make sure you bookmark this page as a reference in
case you ever find yourself at the receiving end of a
nasty forum flame.
By the way, you never have to worry about being
flamed or harassed here at the Free Advertising Forum (http://www.FreeAdvertisingForum.com)
because we do not allow it. If you ever feel someone
is causing you to have an unpleasant time let us know.
We like to keep this a friendly place where everyone
can post.
Happy Advertising!
Warmly,
Michael Rasmussen, Moderator
Free Advertising Forum
P.S. - Have you had a chance to customize your Forum
Webpage yet? What are you waiting for? It includes your
very own ClickBank search engine where you can earn up
to 75% commission on over 12,000 digital products. Many
of our members are earning $75-250 every day!
Click here for instructions. (http://freeadvertisingforum.com/showthread.php?t=67369)
-----------------------------------------------------------
Michael's Weekly Sales Tip:
Send your customers free products with their
product package. The freebies should have your ad
printed on them. It could be bumper stickers, ball
caps, t-shirts etc. This will allow other people to see
your ad and order.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Michael's Weekly Marketing Resource:
Article Equalizer is the fastest, easiest, and most
efficient method of adding tons of quality content to
your web site. You can instantly generate 1000's of
pages for your site from selected articles.
View Article Equalizer (http://www.freeadvertisingforum.com/recommends/articleequalizer.html)
*************************************************
Free Advertising News is a free bi-weekly ezine for
Internet business owners and super affiliates. Please show
your support by forwarding this issue to your friends or
associates who would find this content useful. Thanks!
© Copyright 2005 By FreeAdvertisingForum.com
All Rights Reserved Worldwide.
========================
Free Advertising Forum
1563 Solano Ave., #306
Berkeley, California 94707
Phone: 510-619-9510 Fax: 510-217-9222